


under one sky.

by glass_essence



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Children of Characters, Drabble, Drabble Collection, During Timeskip (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), F/M, Married Couple, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Canon, we die like Glenn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:27:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25858153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glass_essence/pseuds/glass_essence
Summary: He wanted her without need. He wanted her without demand.He wanted her so much it hurt.Where are you, Teach?A glimpse into Claude's thoughts during the timeskip.FE3H drabble collection. Focuses on grief, loss and angst, with a sprinkle of happiness.UPDATED: Sylvain x Byleth.I am a blade and you are not enough. I won't let myself rust by your side.Years ago, Sylvain lost Felix. Now, his life with Byleth is filled with love given freely and returned. Their children live the life he never could. He has everything he wanted, but doubts soon return. Is he enough? And what is happiness without his soulmate?
Relationships: My Unit | Byleth/Claude von Riegan, Sylvain Jose Gautier/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 5
Kudos: 43





	1. Claude x Byleth | stars.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He wanted her without need. He wanted her without demand.  
> He wanted her so much it hurt.
> 
> _Where are you, Teach?_
> 
> A glimpse into Claude's thoughts during the timeskip.

There are some things you can’t run from. Some things are too much, too great. 

Pain will always find you, silent and heavy when the night is dark. Grief will always know your name, and come calling when the wind sounds like laughter long lost. For three long years, loneliness had been the shape of her smile. She was gone, but the memory of summer blue eyes burned, scorching the fabric of his soul. 

He missed her, as fiercely as anything he’d ever known. 

Claude looked up at the stars. They were bright and static, constants in a world that had crumbled beneath his feet. The spread of diamond lights above were immutable and watchful. Cold from afar, but hotter than the sun. Once, those distant stars had brought him peace. Now, they brought only pain.

_Where are you, Teach?_

Somewhere along the way, Byleth had cracked him open, and filled his empty galaxy with warmth. When had she stolen his velvet sky? When had she become his peace? A single year, shorter than a handspan in the wide expanse of time, had left him with a phantom wound that would not heal. Tenderness and trust had brought their stars together and knit them into a constellation that had been torn apart. 

He clenched his fist. Long fingers closed on air. 

He felt so very tired. 

“Byleth.” Her name rolled off his tongue, sweet and unfamiliar. “Come back to me.” 

It felt strange to speak aloud the truths of his soul. He’d grown used to the distance between his mind and his heart. Byleth had closed that distance. He almost wished she hadn’t. 

All his life, he’d wanted things out of need. Even now, the flame of ambition coloured his desires. But Byleth was different. He wanted her without need. He wanted her without demand. 

He wanted her so much it hurt. 

“I know you’re out there, Teach.” Soft words were swallowed by the void. “I can’t come find you, so you’ll have to come find me. I know you will. I’ll be waiting.” 

He turned, leaving behind the lonely echo of footsteps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like to imagine Byleth doesn’t come back in this version, but that’s just ‘cause I’m feeling angsty right now haha. I kind of want to turn this into something more substantial, but I’m feeling worn down by everything atm. Curse you, coronavirus. 
> 
> But if a more fleshed out, oneshot-type of thing sounds like something you'd be interested in, please let me know! 
> 
> Don't forget to drop a kudos if you liked this and thanks for reading! :)


	2. Sylvain x Byleth | clouded.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _I am a blade and you are not enough. I won't let myself rust by your side._
> 
> Years ago, Sylvain lost Felix. Now, his life with Byleth is filled with love given freely and returned. Their children live the life he never could. He has everything he wanted, but doubts soon return. Is he enough? And what is happiness without his soulmate?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was meant to write Felix/Sylvain angst, but this just wouldn't leave me alone. So here we are. Sylvain playing with his kids honestly gives me so much life. I'd love to see fanart of it if anyone knows of any!

_“The war’s over, Felix. Haven’t you had enough?”_

_“Enough of what?”_

_“All of it. The blood. The death.” A sigh. “Don’t you want something stable for a change?”_

_“Stable is boring. Stable won’t help me grow stronger. It’s not enough.”_

_Hesitation. “What about stability with me? We could--”_

_“We kissed once, moron. It didn’t mean anything.”_

_“Come on, Felix. We both know that’s not true. I lo--”_

_“Shut up! This isn’t enough for me!_ You _are not enough!”_

 _Shock and silence. Felix continued, each word a dagger to his heart. “I am a blade. I won’t let myself rust by your side. I_ won’t. _”_

_His friend left, taking with him a piece of Sylvain’s soul and happiness._

\--

“Up!” Laughter pealed through the room, shrill and bright as bells. “Again, daddy! Again!” 

Sylvain writhed on the floor, pawing at his chest dramatically. He let loose a pathetic moan. A young girl stood over him, wooden sword clutched in one tiny fist. She had the Gautier hair, a brilliant crown of fire that lent itself handsomely to her sharp gaze. Ruthlessly, she plunged the sword into his unprotected chest. He gave a low grunt as the blunted point made contact. 

“Stay down!” his daughter yelled, hovering over him menacingly. She was only six, a slip of a girl that might be lost to the wind, but her blue eyes were bright. The sword descended swiftly once more. 

“Not yet!” He rolled away from her clumsy attempt to skewer him. “You’re strong, but the dark evilness within me is stronger!” With a wicked grin, he lunged for her. Long fingers closed around a skinny ankle. She squealed in delight, batting him away before dancing easily from his reach. 

“I’ll cast magic on you, Nadiya!” A small boy, nestled safely in Byleth’s lap, nodded seriously. Stubby fingers traced symbols in the air. “I won’t let you down!” 

Sylvain growled, shuffling about awkwardly on bruised knees. “Stay still, little demon. I can’t catch you!” 

A quiet chuckle rose from the couch. “Looks like the dark evilness is slow, Nadiya. Use that to your advantage,” Byleth advised, running a fine-toothed comb through Leo’s soft curls. His daughter frowned. The crease between her brows reminded him sorely of another time and place. His heart clenched painfully.

 _Thwack!_ The flat of a wooden blade smacked solidly into his shoulder. “Take that!” 

“Ow!” Another blow, faster than he’d expected and none the gentler, landed against his arm. “That hurts!” 

“Good!” Nadiya exclaimed, running around like a miniature hurricane. “Go down, evil darkness!”

The sword, half as tall as her and just as hazardous, met his shoulder and belly half a dozen times more before he let it slide in under his arm. He flopped to the ground, lamenting the bruises he’d be nursing tomorrow. “Ah, to have felled me thrice… You truly are a fearsome warrior.” 

“Of course,” Nadiya stated matter-of-factly. “I’m going to be just like Felix!” 

Sylvain popped an eye open. He hadn’t heard that name in years. Not since ten summers ago, when his friend had stalked off without so much as a backward glance. “Where did you hear of him?” 

“We went to town last week,” she said, tucking her deadly blade back into her belt. “They say he’s so fast you can’t see him move. Like a ninja!” 

Well, that was certainly the first he’d ever heard of that. Felix would hate it. Old memories stirred to life within him. Sylvain laughed. “Swordsman by day and ninja by night? Sounds exhausting.” 

Nadiya frowned at him. “He’s not an _actual_ ninja. He’s an _almost-_ ninja. He’s the best swordsman in Fodlan, after all.” 

Sylvain met Byleth’s aqua stare. Felix had always been talented, but they both knew it’d been the bloody days and close calls that had truly tempered his wild blade into the sharpest weapon in Fodlan. His wife smiled mildly. A fresh wave of guilt washed over him. “He’s definitely the strongest,” Byleth agreed quietly. “You’ll have to work very hard to catch up, you know.” 

Nadiya puffed up. “I always work hard!” 

“Me too,” Leo chimed in, miming strange motions in the air. “I’ll be a great mage so I can protect Nadiya.”

“And I’ll protect you both,” Byleth said firmly. Sylvain rose, feeling the ache of old wounds. Winters were always difficult on his bones, but he was lucky to have his children and Byleth to warm his heart. He eyed his little girl with pride. No crest had manifested so far, but he recognised the markings of a skilled swordsman in the fierce gleam of her eye. She’d inherited his hair and Byleth’s eyes, but her ferocity had come from neither. Some days it hurt to look at her. “Come on,” he said softly. “It’s bedtime.”

His hand dwarfed her little one. Her skin, smooth and unmarked, had seen nothing of war and strife. Someday, he knew her hands would toughen. But it wouldn’t be today. Sylvain led her upstairs. Byleth followed behind, a reluctant Leo in her arms.

It always took him longer than Byleth to coax the children into bed. Somehow, they always found ways to stall him. He didn’t have it in him to turn them down, and so ‘one last thing’ never was the last thing. They’d braid his hair and learn the waltz. Some nights they invented strange guessing games for him to play. Often, they asked about how he met Byleth. Did he know it was love at first sight? How did he propose? How did children come to be?

Tonight, their questions were consumed by the legend of Felix. Sylvain answered them as best he could, though some truths were too cruel for young ears. “You’ll learn of that soon enough,” he said, ushering them both into their bedroom. “Go on now.” When they had finally settled into bed, he read them a story, one of his childhood favourites, and took pleasure in their rapt attention and hungry questions. It didn’t take long before their breathing smoothed. He almost sighed in relief. 

“That was fast,” Byleth commented from the doorway, dressed in one of his old shirts. Her hair was damp and loose around her shoulders. “Defeating all that evil darkness must have been tiring.” 

“It’s dark evilness,” he corrected, shutting the book softly. He planted a gentle kiss on Nadiya and Leo before blowing out the candle. “You really should pay more attention. _Professor.”_

His wife arched an eyebrow. “Oh? Talking back, are we? Seems like someone misses detention.” 

“Maybe I do,” he said, deflating. “I haven’t made much time for you guys lately. It’s always one thing or another. I need to train more with Nadiya, spend more time with Leo.” He threw his hands up helplessly. “Goddess knows you deserve more attention from me too, By.”

She snorted. “Sylvain, you can’t be perfect.”

“I don’t know, baby. You’re pretty perfect to me.” His easy smile slipped into a wince. “Sorry. Old habits die hard.” 

“You’re an idiot,” she said gently, tucking herself against him. She was warm, present and solid in a way that grounded him. He buried his nose in her hair. She smelled earthy, ancient and wise, filled with a wealth of life and love. “You don’t have to be everything, Sylvain. You can’t. What you do is more than enough. For Nadiya. For Leo.” She drew him close. He let her gather him to her, let the frayed pieces of him be found by her touch. “For me too.”

Byleth met his gaze boldly. “You’re enough for me, Sylvain. For all of us. We love you.” 

He didn’t know what to say. She’d seen straight through him. Perhaps she always had. He pulled her to him. Kissed her as deeply as he could. Whispered three words against her tender lips. 

She smiled against his mouth. “I know,” she said, sneaking a hand down to cup him. “So you gonna give me that attention I deserve?” 

He picked her up. Feelings of an entirely different kind flared to life. “You’ll find out.”

\-- 

They lay together, limbs tangled in sheets. Moonlight blurred the hard lines of the room, softening it into something intimate. The darkness around them was gentle and deeply private. Byleth’s head rested against his chest. Her hair, silver in the night, was soft between his fingers. 

“Byleth?”

Her voice was hoarse, lazy with exertion and sleep. “Hmm?” 

“I…” How could he phrase this? “I chose you. Willingly. You’re not second to me.” 

“What are you talking about?”

“Just… that I don’t regret choosing you. I would do it again. In a hundred lifetimes.” 

She shifted, nuzzling into the crook of his neck. “It’s okay to have regrets, Sylvain.”

“You’re not a regret!” 

“You know who I’m talking about.” 

He considered it, the scar upon his heart that would never truly heal. Felix had been his soulmate, the other half of himself. A decade had passed, but he still felt the sting of rejection. Still he longed for a man he would never have. All the years he’d avoided thinking about Felix had changed nothing. Yet here he was with a woman in his bed and children by his side. “You deserve better than me,” he said sadly. “Even now, I…” 

The bed stirred beside him. Byleth sat, naked and beautiful in the half-light. Her eyes were luminous. “Sylvain.” Her voice was hard. “Do you love me?” 

“Yes,” he said firmly, and it was the truth. 

She nodded. “Do you love Nadiya?”

“Yes.” 

“And Leo?”

“Yes.” 

“Are you happy?” 

Her question caught him off guard. Where was this going? “Yes,” he answered. 

“Could you be happier?” 

“I… I don’t know.” 

“Neither do I,” she said quietly. “No one does. But what’s wrong with accepting the happiness we can keep? Does happiness have to be measured in quality?” 

He didn’t know. She continued before he could speak. Her voice had grown soft, uncertain in a way that hurt him. “You’re enough for us, Sylvain. Why can’t we be enough for you?”

 _You are._ He reached for her. Just the lightest touch against her bare back. She folded into him, his woman, his wife. “You are enough,” he said earnestly. “I mean it, By. You’re enough for me. I’m sorry.” 

“I know you love Felix,” she said. “But I’ve never thought I was your second choice. You didn’t choose me. We chose _each other.”_

Her words bit deep. Felix hadn’t chosen him, but he hadn’t chosen Felix either. Not when it had really mattered. He could have followed him, traded his status for the life of a mercenary. Forever wandering, as fickle as dust on the wind. The thought of such a life left him feeling surprisingly empty. Would Felix have been enough to make up for it? He didn’t know. 

_I’m a fool._

He turned to cradle Byleth. “Felix was right, I’m the biggest fool in all of Fodlan.” 

She pressed a kiss into the back of his hand. “And yet I love you.” 

Sylvain felt the warmth of the life they’d built chase away his doubts. A part of him would always regret what could not be. But the loss had led him to something else. It was different, but no less real. 

“I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please drop a kudos or a comment if you liked it! It's motivating as all hell to actually see evidence of people enjoying stuff I write ^^ 
> 
> Next chapter coming soon! Requests are open at [my tumblr](https://glassessence.tumblr.com/). (The page is still an active work in progress so please forgive the incompleteness of it haha).


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